In a recent WSJ article, author Charles Duhigg writes about what he calls supercommunicators. These are “people capable of saying exactly the right thing, breaking through to almost anyone, figuring out how to connect even in the most unlikely circumstances”.
My first thoughts were about how job seekers could be supercommunicators to ace the job interview and breakthrough to move themselves to the top of the candidate list.
You should read more about this topic, but to give you a high-level intro read on.
Duhigg believes it’s important to understanding the different types of conversations that can emerge from different parts of our brains: practical, emotional, and social.
He goes on to say that if we want to connect with others, we need to be having the same conversation they are having.
He shares 4 skills supercommunicators use that we can all learn to do better:
– Ask Deep Questions
Go beyond the typical questions about facts that are conversation dead ends like ‘what’s a typical day look like in this job’. Instead, ask a question that will invite someone to share their values, beliefs, and experiences like ‘what are some of the things that brought you to this company and what keeps you here’?
– Prove You Are Listening
After the person finishes speaking repeat back what you heard in your own words and then ask a good question based on that information you heard. For example after hearing about the position’s roles and responsibilities, repeat them back in summary and then ask a question like ‘have these evolved over time or do you see these evolving in the future’?
– Determine What Everyone Wants
We often go into conversations with a goal, but we often don’t share that goal or ask others of their goals. Conversations where both people know each other’s goal are the most productive. Perhaps in the initial brief introduction of yourself you could say something like ‘my goal for this conversation is to learn about my potential fit in your organization based on my experience, needs, and skills, ‘what are a few things you would like to walk away with’?
– Pay Attention To More Than Words
Watch for the small non-verbal queues like a small smile/giggle, a curious look, an empathetic expression, and explore how that might open a new branch of the conversation. These might be opportunities to dig deeper into a topic, move on, or pause for the other person to say more. You won’t pick up on these queues if you aren’t watching.
Duhigg has a new book coming out Feb 20, called ‘Supercommunicators: How To Unlock the Secret Language of Connection’. I look forward to reading more.
Try these out in your conversations and interviews and let me know how it goes.
Take-A-Way Question: What’s common sense to you from this post? What’s the most intriguing aspect of this post?
